You can only try

You can only try and wait and see you can only hope and stop yourself from
focusing on the bad. I often find that if something good is going to happen or happening
I will begin to swirl about in all the bad that could potentially arouse and take from me.
I lived this way for awhile now and just now am I breaking the cycle, just now are the heavy
chains falling off my feet as I walk away light my wings flutter in delight for they haven't twitched
in quite some time. I can escape from this realm the realm of disappointment and fear.

The passive life I've lead for so long will fall off me like an old garment no longer needed.
Ahh yes you can only try or you can only not try this time these times I want to stick my neck out
there I want to taste life and adventure I want for things to go bad and for me to say that it's okay
to be glad to just feel and to know I can carry on that I am human and us humans are capable of so much
more then fear. I am capable of persevering I am capable of sadness and the greatest joys.
I am an intentional piece of the puzzle no I am not an superfluous piece to cover the grey areas
I am so much more than that and it is time that I lived up to the Special uniqueness of who that I am.


So then I can finally rest finally be settled in I can feel the nook of your arms as I lay and sway in the them.
I am comforted here as I rest with your hands draped over the nape of my neck like a warm cloth soothing my temper and holding me still. You fed sweet delights to me so that I would inch closer to your palm as you pet and stroked my mane I ate and gobbled it up delicious and yummy in my mouth the best food I'd ever tasted. I would flinch at a move too quick paced, but I always came back asking for more Turkish delight to chew upon and that's when you scooped me up I tried to flee I let out a bellow but you never let go just pulled me close
away from the blowing wind and again had your angels hold out their loving touch to me as you held and loved me so. And I frightened still wept so you began to sing your sweet coos to me and that's when I began to listen and notice and see, you are the sweetest most delectable Father that ever could be.